Category: - Coach to Expect Success

Problems vs. Predicaments

10/4/2020

Getting started in a great direction for October with figuring out the difference between problems and predicaments. John Maxwell of course helps us to figure this out with some big connecting ideas to focus on this important distinction. This caught my attention last month and I wanted to share it with you as I think all of us can use some help in this area. This comes from his book "The Difference Maker."

This stuff I think we all need to take with us wherever we go. He gives us some things to take with us in that "a problem is something you can do something about. If you can't do something about it, then it's not a problem. It's a predicament. That means something that must be coped with, endured."

Here are some of his thoughts that he connects with the word PROBLEM:

P = predictors: helping ot mold our future.

R = reminders: showing us that we cannot succeed alone.

O = opportunities: pulling us out of ruts, prompting creative thinking

B = blessings: opening doors we would otherwise not go through

L = lessons: providing instruction with each new challenge

E = everywhere: telling us that no one is excluded from difficulties

M = messages: warning us about potential disaster

S = solvable: reminding us that every problem has a solution

These points we can take with us wherever we go and realizing there are plenty of times to learn new lessons that can help us in our journey. Powerful stuff for sure. Any thoughts or ideas come with this one?

Head over to my podcast page to hear more thoughts about this and other shows. Click HERE for my podcast page.

Find me on Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/coachtoexpectsuccess/ on Twitter: @coachtosuccess and on Instagram at: @coachjohndaly - My YouTube Channel is at: Coach John Daly.

Encouragement - We All Need It

7/10/2020

This has been happening a lot lately, so I thought it would be a great reminder for not only me, but for anyone that reads this post.

I've been encouraged a lot lately. With posting a little bit more on Youtube, Facebook, Twitter, my podcast, LinkedIn, and even just a little bit on Instagram - I've been getting some good encouragement for what I'm putting out there. You know what, it not only makes me feel good; but it gives me more confidence for what I'm sharing out there. So in essence, I'm trying to encourage others just like people have done for me. It's one thing I've always done for a long time and people have told me about the fact that I'm good at it. Which looking back throughout my life, I guess it's been a foundation for me.

In today's world I think it's something that we all need more of. A key element of it that you need to give it to get it I think. If you can keep lifting people up and encouraging them in everyday little moments; it will come back to you many times over. Remember, the world is not going to this for us - it's up to us to do it. That's why I think not only in person we need to do it, but we need to put these messages of encouragement out into the social media world too. There is power in this for others. Knowing that someone is there telling us that we can do something, might be just the thing to get us going. Also remember that sometimes we have to believe in someone else's belief in us. Try it and watch what happens.

The Sting

8/14/2019

The power of reading great books can be life-changing for sure. "Lead With No Apologies" by Jesse A. Cole, Jr. is one of those books. Find the book HERE. One of the main points I wanted to share today was about having an important conversations with your future self. Sounds a little bit strange, I know. But, it's a really powerful concept to try and wrap your head around too.

Think about what your future self would tell you about things that you did well to get you where you will be in the future. Not this can be for a year, five years, whatever time period you want it to be. But also be ready for the tough feedback you might hear from your future self too. Now i'ts not meant to be embarassing or maybe it is. You see, it will only be for you. Nobody else has to know about it. It's not going to be out there all over social media - only if you put it out there will it be.

Hopefully the things that your future self brings up to you, are things that you already know. It's a way to put some skin into the game about fixing things that you know you should fix. I know as I have this important conversation with my future self, many of them in fact - I know it's leading me in a fantastic direction for my life. I hope it can for you too. Remember, your past is your best mentor. Never forget where you came from too. It's connected to your future more than you think. So when you have that important conversation with your future self, remember you both will know and understand those things from your past. You have either learned lessons from those things or maybe you have not learned the lessons yet. Either way, you have the opportunity to start learning from them. That will make for a brighter future too.

Check out more from Jesse Cole at: https://www.kingdommogulcoaching.com/

EMPATHY - The Great Connecting Piece Of Life's Puzzle

5/12/2016

“If you can put yourself in the other person’s shoes, even if you don’t agree, then you can often see the issue from their perspective. This will then open the door for collaboration and communication." – Gail Gross

One of the most powerful views we can take in life is that of Empathy. It’s something that is needed in life for sure. Like other important skills in life, it works best the sooner you learn it. Empathy is all about seeing things from other people’s point of view. Looking around the world, it’s easy to see how much it’s needed. We can’t keep waiting for others do things that are right – it’s up to us to start now in trying to make a difference in the world.

It’s one of the skills that I try and promote to all my students. It’s one of the skills that I constantly try and remind myself that I need to get better at. Having people in my life that offer a variety of opinions, thoughts, backgrounds, ideas, etc., makes me a better person. Just because people don’t think the same way as I do, doesn’t mean I can’t be friends with them. In fact the older I get, the more I think I need these variety of thoughts and opinions in my life. It’s funny since also as I get older, I’m getting more set in my ways too. Life sure becomes interesting when you involve others’ point of view.

The ability to put yourself in someone’s shoes and see things from their point of view is something that is such a valuable skill. If you look at disagreements, arguments, problems in relationships; empathy is the main ingredient in helping in these areas. Since life really comes down to the quality and value in our relationships, this skill is one of the main building blocks I think in life.

When I read student feedback about our Leadership lessons and they mention the fact that they do try and use empathy to see how other people are feeling and apply those lessons to their own lives, that is really cool to see. I can’t tell you the number of times as I’m reading those student comments and I start getting the tears flowing (sometimes right into my coffee), really starts my day off in a great direction when I’m reading them in the morning.

My students teach me more than they will ever know. Their teachings, the lessons I get from their stories and feedback are very powerful. It’s one of THEE most valuable experiences I have as a teacher that applies great benefits to my life and also that affects the lives of people that I connect with too. Want some advice? Try it. Try using a little empathy to help you understand others but will ultimately help yourself too.

Quote of the Week - June 2, 2014

6/2/2014

“Never forget what is worth remembering nor ever remember what is best forgotten.” – Irish proverb from Doug Evans and his book - "A Leprechaun in your Pocket"

Some of my students and I were lucky enough to hear Doug Evans as a guest speaker in my Principles of Leadership classes last month. He had so many Leadership, Success & Life principles to share with all of us - he did a great job connecting with students. He talked about his initial hesitation and fear of not wanting to write a book. But then he got going (with some other people's encouraging) and wrote parts of other books until he got confident with writing "A Leprechaun in your Pocket".

When I saw this quote posted online from Doug, it connected with me and I wanted to share it with my students too, to help both myself and them to remember those things that are really important in life and to try and not waste time with those things that don't matter. The sooner we can remember what this quote stands for and then implement it into our lives, the better off we will be.

This past weekend I had plenty of reminders on this quote. My daughter had her prom and she looked very beautiful along with her handsome looking boyfriend. We were lucky to have a family picture taken with her, me and my wife and our son too. That picture, along with a couple of other pictures from her final couple of track meets over the last few weeks, are going to be kept by me in some special places - as this is her graduation year. So next weekend is her actual graduation and then her party is after that. I am looking forward to taking it all in and getting more pictures with family and friends to remind me on what is really important in life.

There were also some things that I started getting worked up about - silly, little things that don't really matter in the grand scheme of life (at times it takes me a few moments to remember that fact). That is one thing that I am focused on doing - is that when those moments that come along that are not worth my time, emotion, energy, etc., I am working on recognizing them more for what they are: things to get through, fix, solve, etc., and move on! I need to not let those things take away from the things that are really important. How about you? What are things you are working on to remember more and what things are you working on not keeping with you? Share some thoughts - you never know who you might help with your comments.

You can contact Doug Evans at www.discoveryourmissingpower.com

Quote of the Week - April 14, 2014

4/14/2014

"The greatest trap in our life is not success, popularity or power, but self-rejection." -- Henri Nouwen

This quote jumped out at me, tapped me on the shoulder and reminded me that this is not only what I deal with a lot but most people do too. The idea that we need to believe in ourselves before great things can happen is an age-old truth that has been talked about and shared for all of time it seems. It's because it's totally true. We do need to believe in ourselves more than any other thing in life for us to do great things.

This is something that I have not always had an easy time doing. Looking back over my life I can see clearly now (not the song... but I have it in my head now)... where many of my troubles have come from my lack of belief in myself. Since I have been in the front row for all my failures and short-comings, there have been many things that have stuck with me that have gotten in the way of having a strong belief in myself.

Now that I have realized that over the last decade and a half or so, it's becoming a bit easier to see the importance of believing in myself. Which means I need to fix the way I am not only thinking but I need to work on learning from my failures instead of dwelling on them.

My leadership classes this term hammers home lessons like this to me everyday. I know that I am learning as much as my students are - and that is cool. So, what lessons do you have to share with others about these and other topics?

Quote of the Week - January 21, 2013

1/23/2013

"If you want to be happy, set a goal that commands your thoughts, liberates your energy and inspires your hopes." - Andrew Carnegie

Finding this quote on a Monday and thinking about having goals for today (a teacher meeting day) along with goals for the week ahead; got me thinking about having these thoughts going for me long term. Instead of just a Monday or a week, I'm thinking (and I know that) I need to have these going for my future. Thinking about Andrew Carnegie (the steel industry guy) and all the success that he had with people and leadership; I know it's coming from a good source too.

I had a good discussion with a colleague today about focusing in on important things in life. That there are only so many things that we can control and actually do something about ourselves. Happiness comes from the fact that we have the ability to command over our thoughts on those things that are important and that are really important to us. The key is to realize this as soon as we can for then we still have time on our side to do something with this fact. The longer it takes for us to realize the truth to this statment the further away from true happiness I think we will be.

What are your thoughts on this quote? What lessons can you teach me and others with your opinions and thoughts? Please let me know here.

Invest now? Are you crazy??

8/10/2011

Invest in these crazy times? Are you nuts?

So many things are happening with the economy lately, not just in the U.S. but around the world too.

It’s enough to make us want to not invest money into stocks for sure.

How about the banks, they are safe right?

Some are, but not a great return on your investment right now.

I’ve said it before.

And I’m saying it again.

It’s always a great time to invest in YOURSELF.

In fact not only is always a great time to invest in yourself, it’s a must that you invest in yourself.

Here’s a big reason why.

Nobody else will do it.

Here’s another big reason to do it.

Not many people invest in themselves.

You want to make yourself to be able to keep moving forward, keep getting better, keep learning, etc., no matter what is going on in the world.

By understanding those two points we can really move ahead of ourselves and most other people by acting on those two points.

It’s actually a very good insurance policy for yourself too.

One of the best ways to do it is to, just as the great Bob Proctor says “we need to turn off the radio, turn off the t.v. and get into a darn good book”.

Good books include books that make us better, that get us to see what we can do with our limited time that we really have.

They get us to think differently and then to start making the changes in our life that we must do in order to go in the direction that we want to go in.

It can be any type of different information that gets you going in a positive direction towards where you want to go.

Do your homework.

Think about one thing that you know you need to get better at. Or the direction you want your life to go.

Find some time to learn the thing or things that will help you in that area.

Just try it and see what happens.

Now is the time my friend to invest in yourself like no other time in history.

Any thoughts or questions on this, please, let’s talk about it and see what happens.

Copyright 2011 http://coachtoexpectsuccess.weebly.com

Best Apologies We Can Do

7/13/2011

“Right actions in the future are the best apologies for bad actions in the past.” -Tyron Edwards

I read this quote on a Facebook posting this morning and it got me thinking.

What a great quote to think about and then put into action.

Since we all make mistakes, and sometimes those mistakes hurt the ones we love; one of the best things we can
do to make amends is to change the way we act and the way we do things in the future.

Summertime is a great time to take a look at where we are going in our lives. Certain times during the summer, when we get the chance to hopefully slow down and relax; is the perfect time to reflect on things that have been going on in our lives.

Then upon that reflection, it’s time to do something about it.

That "doing" piece, has been a problem of mine for as long as I can remember.

It’s one of the main missing puzzle pieces in my life. I have recently found that I knew what it was, but yet I still have had trouble making that piece fit into my puzzle of my life.

I have found myself saying a I’m sorry to people for not doing things I said I would do.  My wife is the main person that I need to focus this quote on in my life. I can start doing it right now, I actually started yesterday.

Actions speak louder than words. I have learned that in my life and continue to learn it all the time.

What areas can you work on that would make things better with someone you care for?

As always, I think when people share experiences, we all get to learn from those shared stories.  Let me know your
thoughts.

Copyright 2011 http://coachtoexpectsuccess.weebly.com

Games and Life - part 2

6/22/2011

Games and Life – part 2
By Coach John Daly
Re-printed from 2009 posting on my former blog

Picking up from part 1….

The other part of my story with playing golf the other day with my dad happened even before I even got out to his house.

When I was leaving that morning, I stopped at 7-11 for some coffee. As I was getting mine, a lady came in and was upset that they changed her favorite flavor of the cappuccino.   She walked out disgusted and I thought as to what her day was going to be like.

How could she get so upset because of her coffee?    I kind of chuckled to myself quietly.

I love coffee… at times I think it’s too much. But I know that would not really be a reason for me to get too upset and have it ruin my day!  I really felt sorry for the people that she was going to be around today.

I mentioned something to the clerk about it and he said,“that’s nothing, awhile ago, we had a guy come in and yell at the owner because we did not have any of the chocolate creams for his coffee!”

Can you believe that? I guess if we think about it, sad to say, we have all run into someone like this.

Of course this drove home the memory of me being like this at times in my life, yuk, I don’t want to go back to being that kind of person.

The clerk and I both agreed that there are far more important things in life to get worked up about compared to coffee.

I know most people see lessons like that all the time in our day-to-day activities and travels. There are constant lessons for all of us to learn from, every day, wherever we go. It’s just so important for us to pick up on those lessons.

Like I tell my kids, students and players – watch, look and listen.

You can learn so much from others and that means that we don’t have to make the same mistakes we see others making. I know you are thinking of at least one example right now that just came to you about this one.

By the way, the clerk greeted me with a very positive attitude and a “good morning – how are you doing?”  So I knew that he caught the same thing that I did.

I retold the story to my dad as we were playing the 10thhole.  We had both lost a couple of shots– I lost 2 balls and he lost 1. We both had to use the drop area then we both proceeded to miss the green.

Another lesson hit me again. As frustrating as golf is (for me at least), it’s a great, great game.  Not only can anyone play the game, really at any age; but it offers such great life lessons. This time it got me thinking the best way to approach playing golf is just like life.

You have to have a humble attitude along with watching your ego. Golf is very humbling. It teaches you to not get too worked up about little things (like coffee or a bad shot). It’s a learning experience – just as life is.

We should learn from our mistakes on the course and in life. If I ever get to thinking that,“hey, this game isn’t so tough” or “hmm… I’m pretty good at this game”.  The game, just as life, will bring you to your knees.

That must be where my bad knees come from.

My dad and I agreed that we both understood that point.  We also agreed that it was a good thing we enjoyed the company we were playing with too. Remember, who we hang out with in life, does matter.

Do what you can to learn from wherever you are and whatever you are doing. Learn from others.

Keep in mind things that are really important in life. Look for these little success and leadership principles in your day. No matter what’s going on in your life right now, there are lessons to be learned.

Remember, when those brick walls and frustrating moments come up in our lives; two things to think about.

As Dr. Randy Pausch said “those brick walls are there to see how bad we want what we are going after in life.”

The other point to remember is that those are the moments where we can learn the most by the way we handle the brick wall or frustration.

I’m always repeating that great quote that was given to me from a friend – “Don’t play small in life”, someone needs your help.

Get in touch with me to share your stories so you can do just that. Your stories can help someone for sure.
© Copyright , 2011   http://coachtoexpectsuccess.weebly.com