Category: Mentors

The Sting

8/14/2019

The power of reading great books can be life-changing for sure. "Lead With No Apologies" by Jesse A. Cole, Jr. is one of those books. Find the book HERE. One of the main points I wanted to share today was about having an important conversations with your future self. Sounds a little bit strange, I know. But, it's a really powerful concept to try and wrap your head around too.

Think about what your future self would tell you about things that you did well to get you where you will be in the future. Not this can be for a year, five years, whatever time period you want it to be. But also be ready for the tough feedback you might hear from your future self too. Now i'ts not meant to be embarassing or maybe it is. You see, it will only be for you. Nobody else has to know about it. It's not going to be out there all over social media - only if you put it out there will it be.

Hopefully the things that your future self brings up to you, are things that you already know. It's a way to put some skin into the game about fixing things that you know you should fix. I know as I have this important conversation with my future self, many of them in fact - I know it's leading me in a fantastic direction for my life. I hope it can for you too. Remember, your past is your best mentor. Never forget where you came from too. It's connected to your future more than you think. So when you have that important conversation with your future self, remember you both will know and understand those things from your past. You have either learned lessons from those things or maybe you have not learned the lessons yet. Either way, you have the opportunity to start learning from them. That will make for a brighter future too.

Check out more from Jesse Cole at: https://www.kingdommogulcoaching.com/

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Helping Yourself - And Others - To Be Successful

7/15/2017

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Helping Yourself (and Others) Be Successful

There are so many great sources available that can help us in our lives. With the Internet – and especially your Smart Phone – there is no real reason not to constantly be on a path towards improvement!

I’ve been making it a point to do more reading. I’m working on 2 books now and I need to finish one of them (for a couple of reasons) before I start a new one. Reading 2 books at a time is something that I need to do and I know I can. I’ve also been finding some great articles that are making a huge difference with me too. One recent one is titled “7 Ways to Help Yourself (and Others) Be Successful” found at Success Magazine. Click HERE for the article - a great read!

Here are the 7 points with a few thoughts about each:

Give Back: If everyone asked “How can I help” instead of “What can I get?” – we would all see a much different world around us. Has there ever been a time throughout the time of our lives where this concept has been needed more than now? I love the point in the article that we stand on each other’s shoulders to elevate us to our ultimate accomplishments. We can’t be successful on our own.
Surround yourself with people smarter than you: BIG POINT here – Success is largely a factor of the people you make a part of the journey. Guess what? It’s our choice who we let into our lives. There has to come a time where we look to distance ourselves from those that don’t add value to our lives, those that cause us distractions, heartache, problems, etc. We also need to look for those that are good for us, they do make a difference, they do add value to our lives, they look to help and encourage us.
Find a mentor: Mentorship is a service and it is one that we need to find for ourselves and look to provide to others too. It’s a great idea to never stop seeking help from those who are where you want to be. A great by product of serving and helping others is that it helps you become a mentor yourself. Don’t ever let a goal become more important than helping others. Always do more than others expect from you. Under promise and over deliver, blow them away with what you bring to the table. Always try to look to get them excited to work with you.
Be an influencer: The main point about being an influencer is that they look to help others without expecting anything in return. They always look to have win-win situations with others that they are working with.
Celebrate others’ success: It really comes down to attitude as to how we can be happy for the success of others – especially those that we care deeply for. When that happens and we get to embrace the success of others, we get the benefit of greater satisfaction. We feel fulfilled instead of bitter. Our excitement, energy, motivation and drive to do better ourselves is multiplied due to us celebrating the success of others. A very powerful tool that not too many people use. Here was a HUGE point I found: “Beyond seizing an available opportunity where possible, our sense of embracing others’ achievements helps to expand our own willpower.”
Spread positivity: A very interesting observation about our subconscious is really motivated by emotion, not by reason. A strong point made was that positive emotion trumps negative emotion every time! Positive things are much easier to transfer to others than negative ones because they create lasting change. Positive realities, ideas, thoughts, attitudes, etc. = lasting change, movement forward, going after things, growth, etc. Negative realities, ideas, thoughts, attitudes, etc. = NO change, stagnation, going backwards, getting worse instead of better. There are plenty of studies out there that that positivity is not only better for the person carrying around those thoughts & ideas, but also for the other people that they encounter.
Find your motivation: Many times people see successful people and they think, wouldn’t it be great to be like them. They have no clue. Successful people see each day as another opportunity to improve, to get better, to move closer to accomplishing their goals. They will tell you that more you accomplish, the more you will want to keep working hard to make things happen. Motivation comes in many forms. We need to find those forms that connect to us and know that we will need it every day, just like taking a shower.

Any thoughts? Questions? Ideas to use these points in your life? Would love any discussions & comments you want to have. Let me know.

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There Is A Reason We Need To Look Out Through The Windshield And Not The Rear View Mirror

10/19/2016

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"There are far, far better things ahead than any we leave behind." — C.S. Lewis

I often find myself looking back more than looking forward and it's apparent to me now on why at those times, it seems like I'm driving around in circles. I have recently made more of an effort to try and look forward since really that is the only direction that I (and all of us) can go. I can't go back to the past. I can only move forward.

This also brings to mind a quote from the great Jim Rohn where he said "Your life does not get better by chance, it get's better by change." We have the power to change and choose new directions, new ways of doing things, learning from mistakes, and making changes in how we spend our time. He also talks about how we are not a tree - we can move, we can change. That is something that I think we all need to be reminded about more and more, or maybe it's just me?

I've tried looking just at the rear view mirror while driving - it's scary! Now, this was in an open parking lot one time with nobody else around, and it was still scary for the few seconds I did it. It's also the same concept if we look at a bug on our windshield or a crack in it (representing negative things in our lives that we focus on) and that too is terrifying when you are trying to drive a car and your only focus is that one spot on your windshield. You lose focus on where you are going. Yes, I tried that too one time and it was the same, scary feeling.

Our past is there for a reason. It is by far one of our best mentors that we could ever have in our lives. We need to use it as such in order to help ourselves be successful in the future. It's there to help us remember and to get better for our futures. I feel that the stakes are higher for us to figure this point out for two reasons. First is that we don't have all the time in the world to get things done and accomplished. Maybe the second reason is even more important and that is as time goes on we have more and more people in our lives. The relationships with those people are deeper and deeper as time goes on. Things that we do or don't do affect others more as time goes by for those reasons.

One recent example comes from a former student of mine (like so many things that help me just about everyday). I saw a post that Lauren, my former student from a few years ago. She got a letter from a customer where she works that was thanking her for brightening her day every time she came to this business. There were a few visits that she did not see Lauren there and she noticed the difference so much so that she stopped going there for some time. She came back and Lauren was working that same shift again and she made such a difference with this customer again. She wrote this letter to Lauren's bosses to let them know how valuable she was to them.

Lauren's always looking ahead. She did that in school too. She worked so hard knowing that wherever she was going, the good habits she had would pay off. She brings tremendous value wherever she goes. That is something I try and get all my students to realize that's what life is along with being a difference maker to others.

Now to be fair, Lauren had these tools in her tool belt way before she met me. They key lesson to understand we all can do this wherever we are at today. Even if it's at a place that maybe we are not so happy to be at. Until we find a happier place to be, we can still offer great value to others along with making a difference for people too - no matter were we are at. Especially knowing that we are going in a great direction and someday we will be doing even better things, with more people and more places. Thanks to Lauren reminding me about how I need to always do more and get better in this area, she has made another huge difference with me even years later. That is powerful. I hope you see and understand you can do the same thing.

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Be A Difference Maker For Others - Be The Light For Them!!

5/17/2015

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"There are two ways of spreading light: to be the candle or the mirror that reflects it." – Edith Wharton

It has occurred to me over the last few years that one of the best things each of us can do during our lifetime is to help and serve others. I’ve also been reminded about that with one of my guest speakers that I’ve had speak to my Principles of Leadership classes the last three years. That guest speaker happens to be a friend of mine along with being my current boss, Dr. Joe DiPonio. He has told my students that one of the most honorable things we can spend our time doing, is to be of service to others. I could not agree more.

He mentioned one of his mentors from his high school days was the best example of this and he was a huge difference maker in his life. I have one of my mentors from my college days that had the same huge impact on me and my life and the lives of thousands of others. His name was Dr. Wells Cook at Central Michigan University.

Looking back, I’ve always wanted to be that difference maker for my students. But now it seems I have focused on ramping it up more with what Dr. Cook was all about. He’s no longer with us as he passed from a battle with cancer just about 10 years ago already. I think about him often and I look back to everything he did for me and I know it’s the least I can do in honor of him, is for me to get off my butt and start playing BIG in my life instead of playing small. As I’ve mentioned before, playing small does nobody in the world any good at all. It comes down to me looking to help more people than just my students. Spreading the light for me means to invest in people and get them to believe in themselves, just like Dr. Cook did with me.

That is one of my many messages to my seniors this year, invest in others. Believe in them. Be the light for them to show them the great possibilities that they have in their life. Be that difference no matter what you get into in life as you don’t have to be a teacher or a coach in order to make this happen.

So I know I need to continue to ramp up my efforts with my students, my wife and kids and the rest of my family. I need to do this with my basketball coaching that I’ll be starting to get back in with the girls varsity at our local high school where my kids attended. I will be trying to volunteer a little more with the other programs my kids were involved with there; the track & cross country programs along with the band program too. I also need to play bigger with my blog, my podcasts, my videos, getting going on my first book, my coaching programs, continuing to improve with my teaching, more reading, the list is really endless where playing less small would benefit me and so many others.

Ask yourself this – where can I offer more light into other people’s lives? Where and with who can I be a bigger difference maker? Where else in my life can I play BIGGER, instead of playing small? Let me know some of these answers as I would love to learn from you and help you too if I can.

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The Sting

Helping Yourself - And Others - To Be Successful

There Is A Reason We Need To Look Out Through The Windshield And Not The Rear View Mirror

Be A Difference Maker For Others - Be The Light For Them!!

Coach John Daly

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