Category: Life Lessons - Coach to Expect Success

What We Focus On Grows

7/21/2022

Amazing thought here that I got from John O'Leary and Matt Miller from a coaching session a couple of days ago - What You Focus On, Grows! I'm finally figuring out this important fact and I'm hopefully sharing it with some ideas and connections that you need to hear & think about too. Check out my podcast about this HERE.

I've known about this for many years - why I have not put more "stock" into this?? I guess I'm realizing how much of a slow learner I am. But, I am realizing how important it is to focus in on things that I want to choose instead of letting things happen to me where I don't have control. Sam Crowley says it all the time - "Where focus goes, energy flows!" I'm catching myself more often when I start going down a negative rabbit hole & I'm working on stopping myself from going further along with figuring why I'm going there and what the lessons are that I need to learn from that "detour." There is never to late of a time to pick up "new" skills like this. I'm also figuring out how important it is to have little victories in my life - every day that I can do little things, the right way, is one way to build a better life.

We All Need Mental Toughness

7/17/2022

Found a great resource about being more mentally tough - and it's free. Ben Newman - "The Burn Podcast" show, has some powerful guests sharing messages about being mentally through throughout life. So many lessons will be shared with this. To check it out and to sign up - again, it's free, go to: https://mentaltoughnessforum.com/ It's August 2 - 6, 2022. I'm doing more and more things that I know will be good for me & this is one of them. Again, I'm not getting paid for doing this "sharing", I just think it's good stuff.

So much of life is making adjustments in conjunction with not giving up. I think having more examples, more stories about what people go through in life - can benefit us. We can pick up different lessons that we can use in our lives. The only thing that is the same for every human being throughout all of time - we ALL have challenges to overcome. Seeing that is true, we can certainly learn from others for sure. The key is being willing to not only share our stories, but also always look to keep getting better. That way our stories can always look to help more people. Self Improvement and Personal Development go way beyond just helping ourselves. Our journey helps others, even if we don't know it at the time.

I hope you are able to check some if not all of this out.

A recent podcast that I did brings up some of these lessons too. Listen to it HERE.

We All Get Squeezed ...

7/4/2022

Another quick, but great lesson to share with you from Alan Stein Jr's. book, "Sustain Your Game" - and it actually comes from Dr. Wayne Dyer. It's all about what's inside of us. Dr. D asks a question to a group of people - what happens when you squeeze an orange? We get squeezed all throughout life - what comes out of us when we do feel that pressure, etc.

That's something we all can easily answer - at least for ourselves. It's something to take a look at and reflect about too... the earlier the better. It's something I've been trying to do more of lately and try to be conscious of when I get squeezed by life and by people. I'm trying to catch the bad stuff coming out and fixing my responses. Those are the things that I can actually change and control. It's not the stuff coming at me from outside sources, that's for sure.

It reminds me of the great game of basketball. Usually we always want to have our game plan go inside - out. Meaning... getting the ball inside to try and score. Inside meaning to our tall players - post players - where the % is higher for taking shots closer to the basket. Then, as defenses start sagging into the middle to help, the outside opens up for clear shots.

If we look to live our lives from an inside - outside point of view... controlling what we can control.. our actions, our thoughts, our responses, our efforts, our attitudes, etc. If we also can remember that the outside stuff are things we can't control & maybe choose to get not squeezed too hard by those things, that's where we can make a difference in our lives. Easy?? Not usually. Doable? Yep. Something I will continue to work on for sure.

Bravery Is All Around Us

12/3/2021

I found something from John O'Leary again (so many lessons from this guy) and this one is all about Bravery. This interview that John had with Gunnery Sergeant Nick Popaditch and his discussion on Courage, Combat and Recovery. Listen to it HERE. I found myself being totally amazed at this discussion on so many lessons. First and foremost, Nick's sense of humor that he had with life!! Amazing lessons for all of us for if he can have that type of outlook / attitude after having gone through all of these things he described.. that simply tells me that I can do the same with my life too. The things that I have gone through are nothing compared to what he's been through & if he could have his current attitude and outlook on things - so can I.

These 2 quotes really stood out to me as it was something that was said to him that totally changed his life -

“If you don’t quit on us, we will never quit on you.” This is a powerful statement from his recruiter. I look at that statement and think how awesome it is to have a group of people connected together and something like this binds them. Something that will never break. Truthfully - I think of this connecting to a family or even a sports team. It will probably be something that I share with some players, coaches and teams as I see this being so strong to have this mentality going into their season & in life too!
"As a drill sergeant, Nick learned that everything was trained in the antithesis. Courage was trained by fear, honor by unfair treatment and commitment by failing." I look at this piece as something to learn some valuable lessons from. Those things that are fearful for me - I can learn courage from those things. I can learn to face them, get through them and to quit having them stop me from living the life I want to live. We all experience unfairness in life, I can learn to still be honorable to others & myself, so that I don't get soured by the unfair treatments. I look to for sure, not treat others in the same unfair matter. Also, to stand up for those that get treated that way too. The world needs more of this for sure.

We All Need PERSPECTIVE All Throughout Life

12/3/2021

During the last 21 months or so, we have had the opportunity to take a different look at things in our world due to Covid19. The entire world has been turned upside down during this time, as it has affected everyone. For me personally, I looked at the chance to focus in on having more gratitude & perspective from that second weekend in March when the brakes were engaged in just about all areas of life..

This video clip of three "well experienced" people sharing their thoughts & insights about life, gives us a great view into our own lives - all through their eyes. You will want to watch it for sure - find it HERE.

First up was Cliff Crozier - born in 1915 and he mentioned that he had done everything he wanted to do in his life and that he knows how important it is to put effort into staying active and staying healthy too. I tell you one other thing about Cliff - he's got plenty to smile and laugh about. He's got a great attitude for sure. ;-) He mentioned that age is just a number and it doesn't bother him.

Amelia Tereza Harper - born in 1913 and she starts right off about being able to enjoy her memories of her life & the joyful times. Got me thinking about how important (and how much we take for granted) our memories actually are. My father-in-law who passed away in 2020 from dementia, didn't have too many of those joyful memories - or maybe he did, and he simply could not recall them to tell us about them. In watching this video, especially with this part, I tear up every time. I sure am hoping and praying that me and the rest of my family don't have to go through that again - especially ourselves. In today's social media & internet world... taking time to be in the moment, to create the memories and not just "watching" others live life... that's where our memories are going to come from. I can at least remember times without the internet / social media. To tell the truth, I look back at those times with great joy & I do say, I miss them too.

Finally, John Denerley - born in 1914, speaks right away about his "mis-spent youth". He does look back a bit and saw how much he wasted time doing things that didn't mean much. Oh, he had fun it sounds like, but he sounds like he has bit of regret from those time - not a ton, just a little bit. But he sure learned some valuable lessons. He flew in the RAF (Royal Air Force) in WW II and he said, it was more "of an adventure rather than a penalty, even amongst the bombs." Again... a wonderful attitude that he had back when he was young, not just in his later days.

In just about all of my student posts that I read, they all mentioned how they hope to have what these people shared about their lives. The pictures they have around them in the video. The stories and the laughter & yes.. even the emotional parts too.... all go to show what goes into our lives really makes the journey worthwhile. Powerful reflections that I think everyone needs to take the less than 15 minutes to watch his video & do some hard thinking as to what changes you can make to help your life go in a better direction along with having the end in mind, as to how you would like your race to finish up when it comes to that time.

Forgiveness - with the help from Mitch Albom

11/19/2021

There was a great podcast by Mitch Albom on his "Tuesday People Podcast Show"... you can find it HERE. So many valuable life lessons come out of this story that Mitch wrote about him and his professor, Morrie Schwartz, in his award-winning book "Tuesday's With Morrie." Forgiveness is not only one of our Positivity Project character traits - it's one of the HUGE lessons from Morrie that he shared with Mitch in their conversations.

Morrie said, “Forgive yourself first, then forgive others." It's one of the things we tend to miss out on in life and I agree with that since I've struggled with this exact point. I think one of the main reasons for Forgiveness coming up at the bottom of my survey results for the Character Traits Survey that we did when we first started this Positivity Project - is mainly due to the fact that I have struggled forgiving myself throughout my lifetime. Morrie's right... the earlier we start forgiving ourselves, the easier it will be to not let others get in the way of living our lives, all due to what they say to us (or about us), along with what they might do to us too.

The examples that are shared in this podcast are amazing ones for sure. I think they are things that we all can connect with and learn from. This brings to mind that we can easily see that hopefully we are able to see that really all of humanity falls into this issue of learning how to forgive ourselves and others. We also need to remember that it's not easy & that it takes constant work too.

Besides listening to the podcast show (link above), it would be a great idea to check out all the items at Mitch Albom's website (mitchalbom.com) Check out his books... all personal favorites of mine - especially "Tuesdays With Morrie".

Integrity - It's Kind Of A Big Deal

11/19/2021

I found a fabulous article about Integrity, all from the perspective of a wonderful difference maker who was a long-time educator and basketball coach. His name was John Wooden. Here is the article about the connection he had to Integrity - Click HERE.

One of the main things I drew from this article - and from studying the man for most of my life, is that this is such a necessary building block for a good life and we all need to work on it as such. It goes way beyond ourselves too. If we lead a life of integrity, that helps us to connect with more people for sure. It's one of the things (the many things), that the world needs more of for sure. It can lead to a good night sleep, I tell you that. Living a life of character and integrity... it's the softest pillow ever!! We don't have to be worried about lies, or things we said or did, coming back to cause us much trouble.

His "Pyramid of Success" is something that has stood the test of many years. Integrity is like the cement that holds all of these blocks together. It is easy to see that all of these parts of his pyramid - and those Positivity Project character terms really do make life much easier to navigate through.

Love Mixed With Encouragement + Belief

4/2/2021

Sharing a podcast from John O'Leary never gets old. I'm really enjoying the fact that there are more of my students that are getting connected to him and they are finding the tremendous value that he brings wherever he goes. In episode 297, John has one his mentors and good friends, Rusty Keeley on as his guest. Rusty brings up so many great lessons to share but the key is what he has done for John O'Leary personally over the years.

Read this quote from John about his good friend Rusty - "He was encouragement when I needed a lift. Sage advice when I needed wisdom. A connector when I needed a new opportunity, a pat on the back when I needed approval and frequently a kick in the pants when I needed to take action, be brave and grow. In other words, over the past 15 years, Rusty has been my friend."

This is something that we not only need to have in life, but we also need to offer these things to others too. In today's world of 2021, it seems there are so many things happening around us, to us, to others, etc., that we really need great relationships in our lives more than ever before. I think the qualities that are found in this podcast are things that we all can to be. Authentic relationships are so valuable mainly since they seem to be not around too much any more. Especially due to the pandemic that the whole world has been under, relationships - good and genuine ones - have gone up in value more than ever before. Knowing what I know about the fact that is what life is all about - relationships - I want to make more of an effort every day in my life to invest in the ones that I have in my life. How about you? Once you check this podcast out from John O'Leary - reach out here with some comments or reach out to my through my social media connections. John O'Leary brings us great stuff that the world needs more of.

Problems vs. Predicaments

10/4/2020

Getting started in a great direction for October with figuring out the difference between problems and predicaments. John Maxwell of course helps us to figure this out with some big connecting ideas to focus on this important distinction. This caught my attention last month and I wanted to share it with you as I think all of us can use some help in this area. This comes from his book "The Difference Maker."

This stuff I think we all need to take with us wherever we go. He gives us some things to take with us in that "a problem is something you can do something about. If you can't do something about it, then it's not a problem. It's a predicament. That means something that must be coped with, endured."

Here are some of his thoughts that he connects with the word PROBLEM:

P = predictors: helping ot mold our future.

R = reminders: showing us that we cannot succeed alone.

O = opportunities: pulling us out of ruts, prompting creative thinking

B = blessings: opening doors we would otherwise not go through

L = lessons: providing instruction with each new challenge

E = everywhere: telling us that no one is excluded from difficulties

M = messages: warning us about potential disaster

S = solvable: reminding us that every problem has a solution

These points we can take with us wherever we go and realizing there are plenty of times to learn new lessons that can help us in our journey. Powerful stuff for sure. Any thoughts or ideas come with this one?

Head over to my podcast page to hear more thoughts about this and other shows. Click HERE for my podcast page.

Find me on Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/coachtoexpectsuccess/ on Twitter: @coachtosuccess and on Instagram at: @coachjohndaly - My YouTube Channel is at: Coach John Daly.

Statement vs. Question

7/26/2020

Got all fired up from a conversation with the one and only Dr. Jeff Lip. We were talking about a book that we both recent read, "The Final Summit" by Andy Andrews. It was an eye, mind & heart opening book and Jeff brought up some great points that we talked about on his show. Check out his show HERE to hear our conversation and to find his other podcasts to listen to it. One thing I wanted to bring up was this idea of our lives being a mindset of a "! vs. ?". Our lives can be either a question mark (full of doubt, fear, lack of passion, etc.) or it can be an exclamation point (confidence, encouragement, passion, great relationships, etc.).

There are so many things that we can do to get through the "stormy seas" that we all have going on in our lives and how we don't have to be scared along with realizing that we ourselves, can be the "calm" of our own storms. This came from this quote out of the book that Jeff shared with me in our discussion:

"My life which was a question mark is now a statement. Stormy seas do not scare me for I am the calm in the storm. My past is behind me and my future is bright because I now know the secret of the present. I will do something and I will do it now."

Part of this solution to have a life more of a "!" is by having great people in your life that you can talk with, bounce ideas off of, to have in your corner for encouragement and to learn from them too. Another thought is who's "storm" do you want to be driving your ship through? Your own "stormy seas" or someone else's where you are not the one in control. Same thought - do you want someone else driving your ship? I know I don't want that.

Check out my podcast HERE where I share some thoughts & ideas. This is something that will help me to get my day & week started in a great direction. Hope it does the same for you.