Category: Life Lessons - Coach to Expect Success

Bravery Is All Around Us

12/3/2021

I found something from John O'Leary again (so many lessons from this guy) and this one is all about Bravery. This interview that John had with Gunnery Sergeant Nick Popaditch and his discussion on Courage, Combat and Recovery. Listen to it HERE. I found myself being totally amazed at this discussion on so many lessons. First and foremost, Nick's sense of humor that he had with life!! Amazing lessons for all of us for if he can have that type of outlook / attitude after having gone through all of these things he described.. that simply tells me that I can do the same with my life too. The things that I have gone through are nothing compared to what he's been through & if he could have his current attitude and outlook on things - so can I.

These 2 quotes really stood out to me as it was something that was said to him that totally changed his life -

“If you don’t quit on us, we will never quit on you.” This is a powerful statement from his recruiter. I look at that statement and think how awesome it is to have a group of people connected together and something like this binds them. Something that will never break. Truthfully - I think of this connecting to a family or even a sports team. It will probably be something that I share with some players, coaches and teams as I see this being so strong to have this mentality going into their season & in life too!
"As a drill sergeant, Nick learned that everything was trained in the antithesis. Courage was trained by fear, honor by unfair treatment and commitment by failing." I look at this piece as something to learn some valuable lessons from. Those things that are fearful for me - I can learn courage from those things. I can learn to face them, get through them and to quit having them stop me from living the life I want to live. We all experience unfairness in life, I can learn to still be honorable to others & myself, so that I don't get soured by the unfair treatments. I look to for sure, not treat others in the same unfair matter. Also, to stand up for those that get treated that way too. The world needs more of this for sure.

We All Need PERSPECTIVE All Throughout Life

12/3/2021

During the last 21 months or so, we have had the opportunity to take a different look at things in our world due to Covid19. The entire world has been turned upside down during this time, as it has affected everyone. For me personally, I looked at the chance to focus in on having more gratitude & perspective from that second weekend in March when the brakes were engaged in just about all areas of life..

This video clip of three "well experienced" people sharing their thoughts & insights about life, gives us a great view into our own lives - all through their eyes. You will want to watch it for sure - find it HERE.

First up was Cliff Crozier - born in 1915 and he mentioned that he had done everything he wanted to do in his life and that he knows how important it is to put effort into staying active and staying healthy too. I tell you one other thing about Cliff - he's got plenty to smile and laugh about. He's got a great attitude for sure. ;-) He mentioned that age is just a number and it doesn't bother him.

Amelia Tereza Harper - born in 1913 and she starts right off about being able to enjoy her memories of her life & the joyful times. Got me thinking about how important (and how much we take for granted) our memories actually are. My father-in-law who passed away in 2020 from dementia, didn't have too many of those joyful memories - or maybe he did, and he simply could not recall them to tell us about them. In watching this video, especially with this part, I tear up every time. I sure am hoping and praying that me and the rest of my family don't have to go through that again - especially ourselves. In today's social media & internet world... taking time to be in the moment, to create the memories and not just "watching" others live life... that's where our memories are going to come from. I can at least remember times without the internet / social media. To tell the truth, I look back at those times with great joy & I do say, I miss them too.

Finally, John Denerley - born in 1914, speaks right away about his "mis-spent youth". He does look back a bit and saw how much he wasted time doing things that didn't mean much. Oh, he had fun it sounds like, but he sounds like he has bit of regret from those time - not a ton, just a little bit. But he sure learned some valuable lessons. He flew in the RAF (Royal Air Force) in WW II and he said, it was more "of an adventure rather than a penalty, even amongst the bombs." Again... a wonderful attitude that he had back when he was young, not just in his later days.

In just about all of my student posts that I read, they all mentioned how they hope to have what these people shared about their lives. The pictures they have around them in the video. The stories and the laughter & yes.. even the emotional parts too.... all go to show what goes into our lives really makes the journey worthwhile. Powerful reflections that I think everyone needs to take the less than 15 minutes to watch his video & do some hard thinking as to what changes you can make to help your life go in a better direction along with having the end in mind, as to how you would like your race to finish up when it comes to that time.

Forgiveness - with the help from Mitch Albom

11/19/2021

There was a great podcast by Mitch Albom on his "Tuesday People Podcast Show"... you can find it HERE. So many valuable life lessons come out of this story that Mitch wrote about him and his professor, Morrie Schwartz, in his award-winning book "Tuesday's With Morrie." Forgiveness is not only one of our Positivity Project character traits - it's one of the HUGE lessons from Morrie that he shared with Mitch in their conversations.

Morrie said, “Forgive yourself first, then forgive others." It's one of the things we tend to miss out on in life and I agree with that since I've struggled with this exact point. I think one of the main reasons for Forgiveness coming up at the bottom of my survey results for the Character Traits Survey that we did when we first started this Positivity Project - is mainly due to the fact that I have struggled forgiving myself throughout my lifetime. Morrie's right... the earlier we start forgiving ourselves, the easier it will be to not let others get in the way of living our lives, all due to what they say to us (or about us), along with what they might do to us too.

The examples that are shared in this podcast are amazing ones for sure. I think they are things that we all can connect with and learn from. This brings to mind that we can easily see that hopefully we are able to see that really all of humanity falls into this issue of learning how to forgive ourselves and others. We also need to remember that it's not easy & that it takes constant work too.

Besides listening to the podcast show (link above), it would be a great idea to check out all the items at Mitch Albom's website (mitchalbom.com) Check out his books... all personal favorites of mine - especially "Tuesdays With Morrie".

Integrity - It's Kind Of A Big Deal

11/19/2021

I found a fabulous article about Integrity, all from the perspective of a wonderful difference maker who was a long-time educator and basketball coach. His name was John Wooden. Here is the article about the connection he had to Integrity - Click HERE.

One of the main things I drew from this article - and from studying the man for most of my life, is that this is such a necessary building block for a good life and we all need to work on it as such. It goes way beyond ourselves too. If we lead a life of integrity, that helps us to connect with more people for sure. It's one of the things (the many things), that the world needs more of for sure. It can lead to a good night sleep, I tell you that. Living a life of character and integrity... it's the softest pillow ever!! We don't have to be worried about lies, or things we said or did, coming back to cause us much trouble.

His "Pyramid of Success" is something that has stood the test of many years. Integrity is like the cement that holds all of these blocks together. It is easy to see that all of these parts of his pyramid - and those Positivity Project character terms really do make life much easier to navigate through.

Love Mixed With Encouragement + Belief

4/2/2021

Sharing a podcast from John O'Leary never gets old. I'm really enjoying the fact that there are more of my students that are getting connected to him and they are finding the tremendous value that he brings wherever he goes. In episode 297, John has one his mentors and good friends, Rusty Keeley on as his guest. Rusty brings up so many great lessons to share but the key is what he has done for John O'Leary personally over the years.

Read this quote from John about his good friend Rusty - "He was encouragement when I needed a lift. Sage advice when I needed wisdom. A connector when I needed a new opportunity, a pat on the back when I needed approval and frequently a kick in the pants when I needed to take action, be brave and grow. In other words, over the past 15 years, Rusty has been my friend."

This is something that we not only need to have in life, but we also need to offer these things to others too. In today's world of 2021, it seems there are so many things happening around us, to us, to others, etc., that we really need great relationships in our lives more than ever before. I think the qualities that are found in this podcast are things that we all can to be. Authentic relationships are so valuable mainly since they seem to be not around too much any more. Especially due to the pandemic that the whole world has been under, relationships - good and genuine ones - have gone up in value more than ever before. Knowing what I know about the fact that is what life is all about - relationships - I want to make more of an effort every day in my life to invest in the ones that I have in my life. How about you? Once you check this podcast out from John O'Leary - reach out here with some comments or reach out to my through my social media connections. John O'Leary brings us great stuff that the world needs more of.

Problems vs. Predicaments

10/4/2020

Getting started in a great direction for October with figuring out the difference between problems and predicaments. John Maxwell of course helps us to figure this out with some big connecting ideas to focus on this important distinction. This caught my attention last month and I wanted to share it with you as I think all of us can use some help in this area. This comes from his book "The Difference Maker."

This stuff I think we all need to take with us wherever we go. He gives us some things to take with us in that "a problem is something you can do something about. If you can't do something about it, then it's not a problem. It's a predicament. That means something that must be coped with, endured."

Here are some of his thoughts that he connects with the word PROBLEM:

P = predictors: helping ot mold our future.

R = reminders: showing us that we cannot succeed alone.

O = opportunities: pulling us out of ruts, prompting creative thinking

B = blessings: opening doors we would otherwise not go through

L = lessons: providing instruction with each new challenge

E = everywhere: telling us that no one is excluded from difficulties

M = messages: warning us about potential disaster

S = solvable: reminding us that every problem has a solution

These points we can take with us wherever we go and realizing there are plenty of times to learn new lessons that can help us in our journey. Powerful stuff for sure. Any thoughts or ideas come with this one?

Head over to my podcast page to hear more thoughts about this and other shows. Click HERE for my podcast page.

Find me on Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/coachtoexpectsuccess/ on Twitter: @coachtosuccess and on Instagram at: @coachjohndaly - My YouTube Channel is at: Coach John Daly.

Statement vs. Question

7/26/2020

Got all fired up from a conversation with the one and only Dr. Jeff Lip. We were talking about a book that we both recent read, "The Final Summit" by Andy Andrews. It was an eye, mind & heart opening book and Jeff brought up some great points that we talked about on his show. Check out his show HERE to hear our conversation and to find his other podcasts to listen to it. One thing I wanted to bring up was this idea of our lives being a mindset of a "! vs. ?". Our lives can be either a question mark (full of doubt, fear, lack of passion, etc.) or it can be an exclamation point (confidence, encouragement, passion, great relationships, etc.).

There are so many things that we can do to get through the "stormy seas" that we all have going on in our lives and how we don't have to be scared along with realizing that we ourselves, can be the "calm" of our own storms. This came from this quote out of the book that Jeff shared with me in our discussion:

"My life which was a question mark is now a statement. Stormy seas do not scare me for I am the calm in the storm. My past is behind me and my future is bright because I now know the secret of the present. I will do something and I will do it now."

Part of this solution to have a life more of a "!" is by having great people in your life that you can talk with, bounce ideas off of, to have in your corner for encouragement and to learn from them too. Another thought is who's "storm" do you want to be driving your ship through? Your own "stormy seas" or someone else's where you are not the one in control. Same thought - do you want someone else driving your ship? I know I don't want that.

Check out my podcast HERE where I share some thoughts & ideas. This is something that will help me to get my day & week started in a great direction. Hope it does the same for you.

Encouragement - We All Need It

7/10/2020

This has been happening a lot lately, so I thought it would be a great reminder for not only me, but for anyone that reads this post.

I've been encouraged a lot lately. With posting a little bit more on Youtube, Facebook, Twitter, my podcast, LinkedIn, and even just a little bit on Instagram - I've been getting some good encouragement for what I'm putting out there. You know what, it not only makes me feel good; but it gives me more confidence for what I'm sharing out there. So in essence, I'm trying to encourage others just like people have done for me. It's one thing I've always done for a long time and people have told me about the fact that I'm good at it. Which looking back throughout my life, I guess it's been a foundation for me.

In today's world I think it's something that we all need more of. A key element of it that you need to give it to get it I think. If you can keep lifting people up and encouraging them in everyday little moments; it will come back to you many times over. Remember, the world is not going to this for us - it's up to us to do it. That's why I think not only in person we need to do it, but we need to put these messages of encouragement out into the social media world too. There is power in this for others. Knowing that someone is there telling us that we can do something, might be just the thing to get us going. Also remember that sometimes we have to believe in someone else's belief in us. Try it and watch what happens.

I Don't Know, What I Don't Know

7/4/2020

I think this reading more books is tending to agree with me as I am more fired up now than ever before and reading has been a big part of it. My current read is "Mean People Suck" by Michael Brenner and it's another good one. No big surprise as I heard about this book on John O'Leary's Podcast. This whole simple idea that we don't know everything & there are tons of people that think they do know everything. There are a couple of advantages for those of us that realize that isn't true. One is that if we recognize that we only know what we know and we don't know what we don't know, compared to those people that pretend to know it all - we can use that to a HUGE advantage. Just being honest with ourselves about this opens up the fact that we know and want to keep learning.

Those people (bosses, executives, others) that think they know it all - it's the opposite affect and it comes to be more costly too. It not only shuts off new information that can help solve problems, make more money, create new opportunities, etc.; but it is also does bigtime damage to relationships too. Look at those people that are in your life that just always seem to dismiss people because they "think" they know everything. I think we all know people like this and it is amazing how, for the most part we look to not really do too much for them or with them. There always seems to be that tension around them and that always will make things more difficult to get things done.

So again - this book (and the others I'm reading .... see my booklist on my home page), really has reminded me of things that I can do to help myself out. I hope these things help you too. Remember, you gain a very large advantage remembering that you you don't know everything. Remain humble in what you know and always look to keep that life-long learner type of attitude. Since there are so many others doing they opposite, they will actually help you more than will ever know.

Clarity In Our Future

6/23/2020

There are so many things going on where many people are worried about their future. I get it. The economy. Fears about our health with the Covid19 Pandemic around us. All of the civil unrest. Everything that seems to have a political connection to it. The simple fact of human interaction is still not happening like it normally does.

There have been plenty of things that have cleared up too. Things in life that have been shown to be important and things that have not shown that we need to get rid of too. There are plenty of people I think that have learned some important lessons throughout the year 2020 so far. For others, maybe the lessons have not been found yet. Maybe some people are still focusing on the things that are causing most of their troubles.

I found something to tie into this thought in John O'Leary's book "In Awe", where John talks about Fr. Tom Hoar being on his podcast and he brought up a very important question that we need to ask ourselves - Have you had enough? With Fr. Hoar, it's all tied into addiction. He mentions about changing happening when we have had enough of the the life that we have been living and we are deeply looking for something better. He also mentions about being addicted to the unimportant. This is something that caught my eye. Not only do I think we all have addictions to some things in our lives - things that are unimportant are eating up a lot of everyone's time at one point or another in life. I know it's happening to me.

Of the many things happening in this year of 2020, I have found an extreme understanding of many things I don't want to focus on any more. The hate that has sprung up in our lives, heck, it's always been there - but we are seeing it more and more now. Politics! If there is one thing that I have developed a strong distaste for in recent years, it's this. I still vote, but I will not let these political leaders affect my life where I blindly close my eyes, heart and mind to people who have a different opinion than I do. It's a fine line of controlling the information, the opinions of others, the messages that I let affect me and my life and still being able to function in society. The lack of character in our world is something that I do not want to join in with just to fit in.

I need to continue this journey of being better than the guy I was the day before. The important lessons that continue to be thrown at me, I need to not only continue to learn from them but I also need to make the changes in my life that I got from those lessons. In a small way... YES is my answer to that question - Have you had enough? Yes, I've had enough of holding myself back from going after my goals and dreams. Yes, I've had enough of my negative thinking towards others and myself. Yes, I've had enough of mortgaging my future for being comfortable today & not putting in the hard work so that my tomorrows will be better. This pandemic has taught me a lot about wanting clarity for my future. I for one, need to ramp up my efforts for making the changes I know I need to make. What about you?