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Perspective - 3 Short Stories To Help

10/29/2019

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Found 3 very short stories to help us see and think about having a little more Perspective in our lives.  The 3 stories are HERE.    

The first of these 3 stories is about "The Muddy Road" - 2 monks are walking and one stops to help a lady out of the mud.  So he carries her to safety and puts her down and continues on his way.  The other monk is worked up that he did that since they are not supposed to be around females, let alone touch one.  The one who helped the lady mentions that he left her back there, why is he still worried about her?  Carrying on a worry, burden, etc., does not good for our future.   That enables us to keep having that one event cause us more problems than it originally did back when it happened.  I know we need to learn from this mistake, maybe even remember some moments of it so we can learn and get better.  I also try to let it go.  I'm not always successful with that, but I know I need to.  

The second story is titled "The Two Wolves" where a grandfather is telling the story to his grandson on how we all have 2 Wolves inside of us.. the good one and the bad one.  The one that wins is the one we feed the most!  The negative or positive voices we have... that's the key.  We all battle with trying to do the right things in our life and we can be our own worst critic for sure.   But it is shown over and over again which ever "voice" we let drive us, the one we "feed" the most is the one that will control our thoughts, etc.  The key is WE have choice. 

The final of the 3 stories is "The Farmer's Fortune" - so many things happen to this farmer and his son, and every time a neighbor says to him "that's too bad that happened..." or "isn't it fortunate that that happened...".  The farmer responds the same each time... "perhaps" is all  he says.  He doesn't pile on in misery & complaining when things are not going well, nor does he get all fired up when things are great.  He stays even keeled... no emotional swings or reactions... that's a great message for all of us.  It's far more important as to what our reaction is compared to what actually happened to us.  We never know the next door to open tomorrow no matter what we went through today. 

This was a good and quick exercise to try.  Click on the file link above and see what you can get out of these stories as far as perspective goes.  Then let me know your thoughts.  :-)
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5 Traits of Naturally Resilient People

4/15/2019

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Found a great article about being more resilient and if there is something that I have always needed more of, it's this!  The first point is to get some perspective.  Stepping back to see what our challenge really is, and how "bad" it is, that's something I need to do more of.  One of the things - I was just thinking about this morning on my way into work, was that gratitude gives me tremendous perspective.  Some perspective was shared with me (again) from Dr. Joe DiPonio, our Superintendent.  He shared with my Leadership students last Thursday about Mr. Mike Popson who was a HUGE difference maker with him when he was a high school student.  So much of a difference that Dr. DiPonio got into education and has really excelled (some would say over achieved... hehehe) at being a difference maker for others.

The second point was to be realistic about where you are.  That one hits me on many levels, first of all is my age of 53 and that leads me to thinking about so many different things.  My career as an educator and basketball coach and the fact that I am so grateful for each of those and the people that have come into my life from these 2 awesome professions.  So fired up about what is next in my career too since it will still be about being an educator and coach.  

The third point is to take responsibility.  This one again, there is some element or relief and comfort when we realize how important it is to take control of things in our life.  Owning the things that we do and letting go of the things that are not important or essential - that is the key in life. 

Got to love this next one - Having a sense of humor!   I was just talking with a former student today and a few coworkers too. This subject came up with all of the.  We have to laugh.  Especially at some things that are so bad that getting upset will not help, but laughing makes you feel better and I have found it to help calm me down so that I can see some other solution, some other door so often appears that will help me with the original problem.  Plus I've heard it's good for you health wise to laugh a few times a day. 

Last of the five points is to have courage.  It's one of the most important factors in life.  Some of us are better at it than others.  I am not one of those... yet!  I have been working on increasing my courage all throughout life.  I'm getting better but I realize I need to keep working on it since I am not where I want to be nor am I at the place where I know I have to be!

​Great article - check it out for yourself HERE. 

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EMPATHY - The Great Connecting Piece Of Life's Puzzle

5/12/2016

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“If you can put yourself in the other person’s shoes, even if you don’t agree, then you can often see the issue from their perspective. This will then open the door for collaboration and communication." – Gail Gross

One of the most powerful views we can take in life is that of Empathy.  It’s something that is needed in life for sure.  Like other important skills in life, it works best the sooner you learn it.  Empathy is all about seeing things from other people’s point of view.  Looking around the world, it’s easy to see how much it’s needed.  We can’t keep waiting for others do things that are right – it’s up to us to start now in trying to make a difference in the world.

It’s one of the skills that I try and promote to all my students.  It’s one of the skills that I constantly try and remind myself that I need to get better at.  Having people in my life that offer a variety of opinions, thoughts, backgrounds, ideas, etc., makes me a better person.  Just because people don’t think the same way as I do, doesn’t mean I can’t be friends with them.  In fact the older I get, the more I think I need these variety of thoughts and opinions in my life.  It’s funny since also as I get older, I’m getting more set in my ways too.  Life sure becomes interesting when you involve others’ point of view. 

The ability to put yourself in someone’s shoes and see things from their point of view is something that is such a valuable skill.  If you look at disagreements, arguments, problems in relationships; empathy is the main ingredient in helping in these areas.  Since life really comes down to the quality and value in our relationships, this skill is one of the main building blocks I think in life.

When I read student feedback about our Leadership lessons and they mention the fact that they do try and use empathy to see how other people are feeling and apply those lessons to their own lives, that is really cool to see.  I can’t tell you the number of times as I’m reading those student comments and I start getting the tears flowing (sometimes right into my coffee), really starts my day off in a great direction when I’m reading them in the morning.
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My students teach me more than they will ever know.  Their teachings, the lessons I get from their stories and feedback are very powerful.  It’s one of THEE most valuable experiences I have as a teacher that applies great benefits to my life and also that affects the lives of people that I connect with too.  Want some advice?  Try it.  Try using a little empathy to help you understand others but will ultimately help yourself too. ​
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Change Your Life Today - Don't Put It Off

5/25/2015

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"Change your life today. Don't gamble on the future, act now, without delay." – Simone de Beauvoir

As I got up this morning and the sun was coming into our home, I got to thinking about a few things.  Of course most of this thinking started up with my first cup of coffee which always helps.  I looked around at our kitchen which has changed recently.  After almost 18 years in our home, my wife decided it was indeed time for a change.   It all started when Don, a good friend of mine came over to visit me after my back surgery.  He and my wife started talking about our kitchen and how he had started remodeling his with new counter tops.  Well that got my wife off and running with the same idea for our house.

Well fast forward to 7 months later and our home  has a totally different feel to it.  The kitchen wall paper is gone (with my wife doing it all her self – that was a HUGE job) and now not only do we have new counter tops, but also a brand new deep-pumpkin type of color in our kitchen.  The warmth and positive vibes I get from it are amazing as the colors bring out everything in the kitchen, but also the rest of our house as well.

This has not stopped in side.  Our patio has a small makeover too.  My wife moved the patio table to the other side, and set up more of a sitting area on the side where the table was at originally.  We had an old love-seat that swings a little bit that she re-painted and found some new cushions for it along with 2 of our other chairs, and BAM – a whole new look outside too.

Now these are all physical changes to our home – but the results have an amazing affect on us and our family.  It has helped me to get a new perspective on things along with helping my wife to have a new outlook and re-energized perspective on our lives here in our home. Seeing my wife excited and have purpose is amazingly connecting for me to her.   I see these things that she is doing and this connects to her.  It is connecting with her inner-peace to have a relaxing, warm and loving home to spend time in and this transfers to all other aspects of our lives.  It’s also very cool to have this connect with today being our 25th wedding anniversary too.

This coincides with a theme that has been in my heart as of late and that is to get engaged in my life.  To stop putting things off and keep looking to change and get better by stepping out of my comfort zone.  For also me knowing that I need to keep investing in my wife, my marriage, my family, my friends, my interests and joys in life that have to do with teaching and helping others;  along with more investments in my future which connects with all of these items.

You see, our lives change every day.  So why not get on the “change train” and start steering it where we want it to go.  Yes our lives do change every day as we get older, other people’s choices and decisions affect us, the weather changes, the world and the events going on affect us – but the key is we get the choice on how it affects us along with the choice on how we want to change ourselves and the world we live in.  My choices affect my family, friends, students, the places that I work at, and most of all myself.  Those choices of mine also affect the future of all these areas too.  So, please realize the same is happening for you as well.  It starts today, for today is all that we have right now.  What is one small thing to do today that will help you change?
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    Coach John Daly

    In Education for almost 32 years.  Looking to share insights, thoughts and ideas to help everyone find their own piece of success.

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